


Role reversal

by tenmillionotters



Series: Tokyo Ghoul Reverse!AU [1]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Angst, Fake Relationship, M/M, Mild Smut, Minor Character Death, Mutual Pinning, reverse!au - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-12
Updated: 2016-08-12
Packaged: 2018-08-08 05:31:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7745149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tenmillionotters/pseuds/tenmillionotters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not being religious but still having a guardian angel is a nice coincidence, not so much for the<br/>ghoul investigator Yomo whose guardian angel turns out to be an SS rated ghoul.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Role reversal

**Author's Note:**

> This wasn't supposed to be so long and this was supposed to be porn only I have no idea what happened this is a mess - I still hope you like it... it's the start up for a series by the way!!

He had seen him before, the investigator with the silverish white hair and a stern expression. Just like any other investigator he carried one of these metallic briefcases around, but he barely used it. ‘You’ll never get promoted if you don’t start killing ghouls’ That’s what his partner had told him once, but he just shrugged it off. ‘I don’t care about things like promotions and I don’t think it’s necessary to kill every ghoul we come across.’ 

The young woman just stared at him in disbelief and laughed before they focused on unimportant things again. Didn’t he break the most fundamental rules of the CCG with that kind of mindset? 

Nobody seemed to report him because he was still roaming the streets wearing his uniform or maybe they just couldn’t fire every employee who refused to do the dirty work. 

Itou impatiently licked his lips as he watched him walk past again, hasn’t he noticed yet or was he just pretending he didn’t realise someone had been following him for weeks now? It wasn’t like he wanted to eat this human, there were enough other walking treats, no… he just thought that this one was incredibly interesting. 

They had a steady pace, talked about unimportant things, things like what they should eat for dinner, plans for the weekend, about their family members… Why were humans so pretentious about things like that? Or did they really care…? He scoffed and focused on their movements again. 

Suddenly the investigator and his partner started walking faster, then they started running, it was hard to keep up with them while trying not to be seen, did something happen? It seemed like something had caught their attention. 

The ghoul cursed under his breath and tried to make out where they ran off to, but he couldn’t follow the investigator’s scent, it only made him dizzy and lightheaded for some reason. 

He could still trust his ears though, still it was too hard to make out where they headed, sudden screams and the noise of splitting bones made his blood run dry. What if something happened to the dove? 

“Fuck this…” There was no way he could lose more time, so he put his hunting mask on and hurried towards the source of the noise. If another investigator would spot him now he’d be in a lot of trouble, but he didn’t really care. He heard screams and shouts, the smell of human blood mixed with the scent of ghouls. It felt like time passed to quickly, while it didn’t pass at all. Then he finally arrived at the scene, moments before the catastrophy of this drama could take place. 

One dove had fallen, her blood was soaking through her white feather dress as her eyes were still widened in terror, blankly staring up into sky. 3 ghouls had fallen victim to the investigators but one was still standing, getting ready to take revenge for his fallen brothers. 

“Fucking dove…” He spat it out along with a few teeth. “See you in hell.” 

“... I’ll be waiting for you.” Was he nervous? Well, he expected to die young and at least he put up a good fight before meeting his maker. Still it was a little disappointing, he at least wanted to tell his little niece that he loved her one last time. Maybe he should just make peace with this situation, his whole body was in pain, he lost a lot of blood and he wouldn’t be able to ever look Misato’s wife in the eyes again when he had to explain to her that she had to die such a pointless death. 

The ghoul who was seemingly angered by their plan backfiring so badly got ready to attack one last time, not with his kagune, he wanted to strangle this bastard with his bare hands. He wouldn’t be able to scream and he’d slowly die, struggling, while being in more pain than ever before. 

But before he could attack the investigator, nine tails pierced through his body and tore it apart. “Sorry to interrupt the fun…” 

The investigator tried to move out of the line of fire but it was too late, the other ghoul was already bending over him, staring down on him, his red eyes were glowing, piercing. Now he knew that he would definetly not see another day, he knew who this was. It felt like the universe had finally given up on him as it send SS rated bikaku Yako, a nine tailed fox demon in the worst possible moment. 

“Oh fuck me…” Funny that these would be his last words. Shouldn’t he at least try to come up with something a little more heroic? Well, he could still blame the pain and the blood loss. 

How bold he was, Itou took his mask off and grinned. “Well… if that’s what you want.” 

Why did he deactivate his kakugan? What in the world was happening right now? 

“But it’s really not the time to think about things like that, you need to see a doctor first.” 

Funny. “I would if I could.” And was the perfect time to faint. 

What was he supposed to do now? It would take a pretty long while for people to show up here, in the back alley behind an office complex, it would also take way too long for the CCG to notice that they were gone. First rang investigators weren’t especially what you’d call their top priority, but he couldn’t let him die. Not because of any sentimental reasons no, but he couldn’t just let his only source of entertainment decay here. 

He surely carried a phone around… Yes, he did in the left pocket of his coat. Thank goodness Itou wouldn’t have to unlock it to call an ambulance. Now he had to pretend to be a innocent little brat that just walked into the scene not knowing any better, as soon as he mentioned that an CCG investigator was injured he was reassured that they’d make sure to be there as soon as possible. 

Itou didn’t plan on staying that long but this fucking idiot just wouldn’t keep his eyes open. Maybe he should at least stop the bleeding, there was so much blood and other fluids spilled all over this battle scene it wouldn’t do harm if he’d use a piece of his shirt to stanch his wounds. 

After a while the investigator opened his eyes again, it seemed like the pain that ran through his body brought him back to live. 

“Keep your goddamn eyes open…” The ghoul hissed and grabbed the other’s face. “Listen, I called the ambulance and they’ll be here soon, I’ll be gone before they arrive so try to stay alive until they come.” Then he got up and got ready to leave being sure that the dove would survive, but the man pulled him back. 

“Wh-” He wasn’t even able to finish a word before he shut his eyes and moaned in pain. 

As much as he usually enjoyed seeing people like that now it really wasn’t fun to him. Itou turned around and their eyes met. “I’ll explain everything to you when you can think straight again. You owe me something…” 

“... name…” 

This was a joke right? “How am I supposed…” Itou sighed. “You’re an investigator, how am I supposed to trust you? You already know how I look like without my mask, I won’t take the risk of serving my head on a silver plate to a dove.” 

“... know me…” 

So he did notice that someone was following him the whole time… What would be safer, coming up with a lie or telling him the truth? It would be interesting to see if he’d turn his back on the ghoul. “Kuramoto. That’s all you have to know.” 

“... Yomo…” 

Well at least he’d now knew the name of the person who’d lead to his untimely death. He rose his head at the sudden noise of sirens and a vehicle approaching.“Sorry, I have to leave you hanging now but I have to go. They’re coming.” 

Thank goodness, Renji wasn’t sure if he could stay awake any longer, but he had to. Now he had a new reason to hold on a little longer, there were still so many things he needed to ask Kuramoto. 

“Over here!” 

The voices of the paramedics were faint, distant, he slipped in and out of consciousness as they prepared him for transportation. At least he was safe now, wasn’t he…? He heard them talking to him, their eyes met a few times but Renji could barely make out anything. Just stay alive until they come… that’s what he said. Easier said than done. 

“Up! UP!” 

Tiny hands touched his face and Renji slowly opened his eyes to find his niece being held up so she could grab his cheeks. 

“OJI!” Little Touka stared at him and started crying as soon as he opened his eyes, she started kicking because she wanted to sit on her uncle’s bed so she could cuddle him, but her father wouldn’t let her. 

“Hey… I can’t cuddle you now little bunny… I’m still sick…” How sick exactly? Well he could barely move his left arm, his right leg hurt, his spine felt like every vertebra was out of place and he was still dizzy. The respirator in his nose felt uncomfortable and he wouldn’t even start about the infusion. 

His niece was a little upset and started crying louder, she didn’t quite grasp what happened to her uncle and had to be carried outside of the hospital room by her father so she could calm down. 

Who else was in the room? Only his sister, it seemed like even though he was just a first class investigator he still got special treatment. “Why do you look at me like that? I’m still alive.” 

“Yes and you should be grateful for that -” Her voice cracked and broke as she started crying. “You stupid a- … I told you to take care of yourself! I don’t want to lose my little brother…” 

Renji sighed and tried to sit up but the pain bound him to his bed. “... how long was I unconscious…?” 

“2 weeks… they said you lost a lot of blood and a few of your bones are broken, it’ll take months for you to fully recover.” Hikari took a deep breath and tried to calm down. “But.. they said you were incredibly lucky for actually having survived. Who ever called the ambulance did it just in time. Do you know the person?” 

He shook his head and looked her in the eyes. “No, sadly I don’t.” Could this even be considered a lie? Not really. All he did know was that the person was a ghoul and his name was Kuramoto. Renji let his body sink into the mattress of his bed again. What else…? He had black hair, dark brown foxish eyes, was about 1,70 meter tall and… was maybe in his mid twenties, so a few years younger than him. 

She wasn’t really convinced by his answer, but she wouldn’t dig deeper. “If you say so…” 

Now wasn’t really the time to start heated discussion about whether or not ghouls could be trusted, but when Renji was honest the big picture got incredibly blurry with time. Ghouls blend into human society very well, that’s what his co workers said, but they were still monsters. Really...? In the end they only killed to survive, just as humans did… but humans also killed each for more trivial reasons, sometimes they didn’t even need a reason. 

“... Hikari, I know what kind of risks I got myself into when I became an investigator. I hate this job but I won’t back out of it now…” Maybe at some point he would finally leave the CCG behind but for every life that he saved, no matter on what side, it was worth to stay there a little bit longer. 

Could she argue with that logic? Should she really argue with him now? A few tears started rolling down her cheeks before she stood up from the lonely chair in the middle of the room and walked over to her brother, she carefully took a seat on the edge of his bed and pinched his cheek. “Idiot. You know that we all love you very much, I couldn’t bare losing another brother…” 

Renji felt like all of his wounds were ripped open again as he pulled his sister into a tight embrace with his still functioning arm. “... I know… I’ll take care of myself… I promise…” He couldn’t promise that he’d stay safe, but the least he could do now was to comfort his sister. 

After awhile his brother in law walked back inside, holding his daughter in his arms while she was holding onto a large plastic bag. Apparently she’d dragged her father into the gift shop, judging by the bright blue letters on the bag that spelled out the hospital's name. 

“She wouldn’t stop staring at me until I did what she wanted…” They walked over to her uncle and she carefully gave him the large bag she was barely able to hold. 

“For me?” 

“Yes, yes! Look!” Little Touka squeaked, she could be as loud as she wanted while she was in her uncle’s hospital room and so she took the opportunity. 

“Okay…” Renji tried to sit up once more but it was rather difficult so he just pulled the present out of the bag without putting on a show. “Oh!” A pair of round black eyes stared back at him as he held a rather large teddy bear in his hands. “Thank you.” 

“Smile! See? Smile!” The little girl buried her head in her father’s shoulder and giggled happily. Maybe she couldn’t hug her uncle, but she could make him happy and that was all that mattered right now. 

“Yes, your uncle is happy now, but I suppose we should -” Hikari stopped midsentence as someone else stepped into the hospital room. “Oh, hello.” 

“H-Hello.” A nervous young man was standing in the door frame clutching a bouquet of colourful flowers while nervously staring at the small family. “I-I can leave if it’s inconvenient a-at the moment.” 

“No no, it’s okay.” The older Yomo sibling smiled. “We were about to leave anyway.” Did her brother have a boyfriend? Well maybe it was just one of her brother’s younger colleagues, but that was an explanation for the flowers that mysteriously appeared from the 2nd day on since her brother was in the hospital. 

“Say goodbye to your uncle, Touka.” Arata carefully brought her on eye level with Renji. 

“Not go.” Her tiny hands grabbed his face again and she pressed a sloppy kiss on his nose. “Ah.” 

“I love you too.” But he glanced at the man who had just entered the room. Why in the world did he show up here? Noticing that he wouldn’t pay much attention to them now, they bid their farewells and left the room. He smiled at his relatives as they quietly left the room and then turned to the other man. “... what are you doing here?” 

As soon as he was sure that nobody else was watching them he straightened his posture and stopped smiling, the tone of his voice sounded a little more stern and sober than it did before. “I was checking on you… curious when you’d finally wake up.” 

Then he walked over to the nightstand and took the empty vase that was still standing on top of it and filled it with fresh tap water. 

“And you brought me flowers…?” Renji grinned amused, he really didn’t expect that. 

“... not for sentimental reasons… I knew the nurses wouldn’t let me walk in here if I wouldn’t tell them a lie about who I am and what I’m doing here. So I just told them I’m your boyfriend and that I’m worried sick about you.” 

“Oh, okay.” Right, he had been unconscious for weeks now, it would have been odd if a stranger just walked in and out of his hospital room. 

“I’m glad you’re alive.” Was he sincere now? “... you’re the first person I saved I guess, it’s an odd feeling.” Usually he only cleaned after the mess everyone else made, he didn’t care too much about good deeds, but it was nice to see that someone was still living and breathing because of him. 

“I guess I owe you something now?” Not that he had the highest rank in the CCG, but in case Kuramoto would get in trouble he could surely pull some strings in his favour. 

The young man laughed and pushed his bangs aside. “You’ll owe me a huge favour considering that I’ll make sure that your ass is safe in the future.” 

“Why do you do this? We don’t even know each other.” 

Good question. Itou carefully arranged the flowers in the vase and placed them on the nightstand next to Renji’s bed before he sat down next to him. “You’re the only person… the only human I’ve ever seen who doesn’t treat ghouls like monsters... I mean you know that we’re ghouls and you still don’t treat us differently. I always have to clean up the mess they're making… So I started following you around, I was surprised to see how many ghouls you spared, how you helped them get away.” 

Renji was quiet, what should he say anyway? 

“I know that you're getting yourself in a lot of trouble if they ever find out what you're doing. Why are you risking your life like this? You don't even know these people.” Even Itou who did know some of them would never do what the investigator did. 

“Because I know that you're not monsters. Your lives are worth just as much as ours.” He turned his head to the window and stared outside. “I am in no place to decide whether or not your lives are worth more or less than mine. We're equal.” 

Itou scoffed and looked down on his hands that were resting on his lap. “How can you think like that?” Something must have happened to him, otherwise it just wouldn't make sense that an investigator had this mindset. 

“My brother died in a car crash 4 years ago.” 

But his brother surely wasn't a ghoul. 

“His girlfriend Haru was with him.” It felt like the words were just falling out of his mouth. “She was a shy and timid person, she came from Korea to Japan just to study. My brother met her in the train when he was on the way back home from work… He said…” Renji laughed and wiped the tears that rolled down his cheeks away. “He just knew she was the right one the moment their eyes met for the first time.” 

After a long pause Renji clenched his fists and bit his bottom lip. “She felt the same way for him, there's no doubt about that… She loved him even when he was already gone…” 

Why did he have to relive this night again? Why couldn't he just keep this memory locked away in the darkest corner of his being. “It was a rainy night… On a weekend, I think I was already asleep when I got her call, she was crying and screaming… Said that their car lost grip on the wet asphalt and that they crashed into a tree, I could barely make out anything she said… Until she told me that my brother had died.” 

Another long pause followed these words. “I was… Confused, why was she still alive? Why didn't she just call an ambulance? Instead… She asked me to come to see her. She said she doesn't want to be alone, that's she's scared.” His voice lost all of its strength and he was barely whispering now. “I immediately got up and ran to my car, leaving my phone on speaker so I could still talk to her. It felt like I had to drive hours until I finally reached her…” 

Something about this story was off and Itou knew that what he'd tell him next would be the answer to his questions but he actually didn't want to know. 

“It was horrible… His legs were twisted and broken, his eyes were still open, staring into the night sky and his clothes were soaked in blood and rain. Next to him sat Haru. The shy and timid Haru… Her legs were twisted and she was stuck between the dashboard and the passenger seat… She stared at me, her kakugan was activated and she cried harder as she saw how shocked I was.” 

\---

“Renji please…” The young woman whispered. “Please don't look at me like that…” Her black hair was falling into her face as she tried to avoid making eye contact. “Please…” 

He froze in spot and didn't know if it was for the shock or the cold rain that was pouring down on the scene before him. “I-I -” Unaware of her true nature he didn't bring his quinque along, he never thought that his brother would hide something like that from him. “Did he know?” It was almost like a reflex, this person was dying and he still had to interrogate her. 

“He did…” Haru started crying harder. “RENJI PLEASE KILL ME! Please. PLEASE I CAN’T DO THIS! I CAN’T -” Her screams were so painful and they echoed through the valley up into the hills. “I love him… I love him so much… and this hunger is driving me insane, I don’t want to…” 

As soon as he moved her hand towards Daichi’s face Renji felt his legs getting weak, would she…? She carefully shut his eyes and whinned, the pain got worse, but she wouldn’t let it control her actions. “... all I wanted was to be with him… for the rest of our lives… is that too much to ask for?” Haru’s kakugan was still activated, but all Renji could see were her sad brown eyes. “This existence is a curse… and now it’s took everything from me that made my life worthwhile…” 

“No… no it’s not…” He stepped closer to wreckage and reached for Haru’s hand through the broken car window. “You deserved happiness and my brother loved you so much…” They even wanted to marry, everything was planned, everyone was looking forward to it. “This is not your fault.” Tears started rolling down his cheeks and mixed with the rain. “You deserved more than this.” 

She closed her eyes as she squeezed his hand tighter. “Thank you for coming here… I just… didn’t want to die alone… do you hate me now?” As she opened them again and her kakugan wasn’t visible anymore. “Now that you know what I am?” 

“... you’ll always be Haru to me…” Renji tried to smile but he felt how she grew colder, how her body slowly sunk deeper into the passenger's seat. “Shy and timid Haru…” 

“I’m glad…” If she could have, she’d smiled at him. “... that I got one more chance to see you… Little sunshine…” 

“H-Haru - Haru no, HARU OPEN YOUR EYES -” 

\---

Itou just stared at Renji who avoided eye contact. 

“I stood with them until the police finally arrived, the villagers who lived near the valley had heard the crash and her screams… they were surprised to find a member of the CCG there, but they didn’t interrogate me.” He sighed and looked at the ghoul. “When I’m honest, I could have never changed the way I felt about Haru… even when I learned she’s a ghoul, she was my friend… my brother loved her for the person she was, regardless of… being a human or not… that’s the reason why I don’t want to kill ghouls if I really don’t have to. For her sake.”

She’s dead, that’s what he wanted to say, Itou didn’t understand this sentiment, he didn’t even understand how people could talk about love. He never let anyone so close and when he was honest he really didn’t intend on ever doing so. 

Silence spread between them for a couple of minutes, it was welcomed by Renji as he needed time to recollect, but Itou thought it was rather uncomfortable. 

“But now that I answered your question, I have one for you too and I think it’s only fair if you’re honest with me… was your only reason to save me curiosity?” 

Honestly he said? Itou bit his bottom lip and moved closer to Renji, then he bent over him and leaned in close. “... you’re interesting to me more than just one way.” 

“Oh really…? Is that so?” 

What was this tone that swayed in his voice, suddenly he sounded different than before, Itou felt how it send shivers down his spine and he felt dizzy again. 

Renji let his fingers run through the other’s hair and pulled him close, the sudden shift in the mood was way too hard but he was glad to finally get his mind off. Their lips had barely touched and they already felt tension build up. 

Their tongues rubbed against each other and Itou moved closer to Renji, digging his fingers deep into the mattress of the hospital bed. This was so much better than he imagined. He softly moaned into the kiss as Renji started teasing his palate with the tip of his tongue, not even out of coma for a few hours and he already had enough energy for something like this.

Itou coudln’t help but grin and gently pressed his body tighter against the other, it seemed like he was welcome to do so as he wrapped his functioning arm around his waist. Only a soft knock at the door of the room made them stop and back away from each other. Renji coughed awkwardly before he told the person at the door to come in. 

“Oh! I hope I didn’t disturb you, but I have to run some tests Yomo-san.” It was a young nurse with a friendly smile. She was pretty, with her chocolate brown hair tied up in a neat bun and her healthy tanned skin that softly glowed in the afternoon sun. 

But no matter how friendly humans would be, they would stab him in the back as soon as they knew of Itou’s true nature, still he had to play along. “A-Ah I’m sorry, I w-was about to leave anyway.” God how he hated to pretend to be awkward and shy, but this role helped him to get by, people seemed to like him like that. “I’ll come back tomorrow.” 

He gave Renji one last kiss not really caring about the nurse seeing them or not, he just wanted to feel his touch one last time before he had to go. 

And it seemed like the investigator felt the same as he pulled him a little too close, but quickly letting go after he remembered that they weren’t alone in the room. “See you tomorrow.” 

The young ghoul nodded and left the room, it felt more like fled out the room. His whole body felt like someone had set it on fire, he felt a painful erection pressing against the fabric of his pants as he pulled his sweatshirt down. Not that he would bother about people seeing it, but he’d rather cover it… just in case. 

How could a simple kiss excite him so much? Was it because he waited for his moment so long? Everytime he tried to remember how the other tasted it was hard to wrap his mind around it, oddly enough not like food… but still addictive enough for him to long for more. If this nurse just wouldn’t have showed up so suddenly… 

Why was the way back home so long now? All he wanted was peace and quiet, he ran passed his neighbours without greeting them and he slammed the door shut as soon as he got inside. 

He inhaled and exhaled deeply before touching his lips, somehow it was still hard to believe that they had kissed… just thinking about it made his heart rate increase and his blood rush even more violently in his lap. 

Itou didn't have any feelings for the human, it was just that his scent was intoxicating, it made him feel dizzy and made his blood boil. How convenient that the human apparently felt the same way, judging by the way he kissed him. 

He stumbled to his bed and sunk into the mattress, his fingertips brushed over the bulge in his pants. What a simple kiss could do, but Yomo knew which buttons to push, he knew which spots were sensitive to gentle touches. Itou’s fingers brushed over his neck it just didn’t feel right… the other man was just 10 centimetres taller than him but he wasn't was build as slender as Itou, he had larger hands, longer and thicker fingers. 

The skin on his hands was soft, which was quite unexpected, but maybe he wore gloves when he worked out and used his weapon, how would these hands feel on his ...

Should he…? Well he had nothing better to do anyway so he could just blow off some steam. It was such a relief to finally be able to take his pants off, it got incredibly uncomfortable to wear them at this point. 

Itou sat up and his hands blindly searched for a small bottle of lube that was buried underneath his clothes. He exhaled sharply as the cold liquid poured over his erection, then he let his body sink back into the mattress. 

What did he usually think of when he did this? Before he met Yomo, he did not really about think about anything in particular, after he saw him a few times and realised that his scent worked like an aphrodisiac to him, blurry and static pictures of the other man filled his mind. 

Now these pictures were clear, now that he knew that he wouldn't be rejected, now that he knew what his touch felt like… Yomo had very full and soft lips, there was no doubt that they’d feel nice wrapped around his cock. With those lips and that tongue? Itou accidentally moaned a little too loud as he imagined how the investigator would lick over his shaft before swallowing him whole. 

He wasn't too large in size, decent, average maybe. So it would be no problem to take him in completely, Yomo would make sure to make eye contact, grin slightly and touch himself in the process. Itou felt his body shiver as he imagined how their roles were switched for once, now he wasn't the one in control. 

He'd be the centre of attraction while the dove would tease the tip of his dick with his tongue, he'd be barely able to respond when the other would stroke his erection with gentle force while asking him if he likes it. 

Usually he wasn't the masochistic type but he wanted Yomo to dominate him, he wanted to whimper and scream while he'd cum right into the other’s mouth, for now he could only release his load in his hand. 

Just to imagine how his body would sink deep into the mattress under the weight of another body made him feel the blood rush into his lap again, but he was too tired to give himself another handjob now. 

Itou groaned as he rolled on his stomach and grabbed the lube bottle again, this time he poured it over his fingers and slowly pushed one by one into his rectum. How would the human do it…? The pictures in Itou’s head were so vivid, how Yomo would bend over him while he slowly fingerfucked him. 

He'd take his time to properly prepare him, he didn’t come of as the careless type, but Itou was pretty sure that he’d would love to tease him. Just let him suffer in his own little hell, he’d ask him if he likes it like that, he’d press his body against him and whispers in his ear. ‘Do you like that? Or do you want more…?’ But he wouldn’t even be able to respond, his mind would be blank, static. All he’d feel was the painful pleasure of losing himself in another person. 

Just using his fingers wasn’t enough now, his vibrator might not be as large as his dove but it was enough for how. 

The ghoul exhaled sharply as he slowly pushed the toy deeper into his body, his legs were already shaking and he felt tired but there was no way he’d stop now. He inhaled and exhaled deeply before he turned it on. Itou dug his teeths deep into his pillow as his hips started shaking lightly, his eyes rolled back as he moaned under the increasing pressure on his prostate. 

Even though this surely was nothing compared to the things Yomo would do to his body, it felt good. … maybe even a little too good. He bit the pillow and dug his fingers deep into the mattress, his mind was overflowing with pictures of events that were to come once his little bird could leave the cage. 

“Fuck…” His body was already exhausted and he came faster than expected, then he rolled to the side, breathed heavily and turned the vibrator off before removing it. So they’d meet again tomorrow… this whole thing could turn out to be very interesting for him. 

Every day for the span of three months Itou would visit the investigator in the hospital, sometimes he brought him new flowers other times he brought him candy. Not that he actually knew how the things tasted like he bought, but he always watch girls buy things for their boyfriends and just went with their choices. 

Itou was always around, during the times they changed Yomo’s bandages, when he learned to walk again. For some reason he was incredibly amazed by the whole process and even the doctors were a little surprised by his childlike enthusiasm to learn more about the healing process of the human body. 

They had too look like a normal couple for the nurses and doctors, but as soon as they left they ever used the chance to get intimate or more familiar with each other and so the time passed faster than expected. 

“I can leave tomorrow…” Since Renji could walk again there was no chance to keep him from doing so. “They just want me to stay one last night to make sure that everything is okay.” 

Itou sat on his bed and patted his stomach, he always did that when he was bored or lost in thought. “Are they really sure you’re okay? You humans are so fragile.” It wasn’t like he’d now stop looking after Yomo, maybe he’d even get a little more careful now. “... I never thought I would befriend a human…” 

“Maybe there’s something about me that attracts ghouls’ attention.” He grinned until he looked at Kuramoto who didn’t seem to get the joke. “Oh my God not in that way -” 

“Don’t make my life harder…” How about his don’t get close rule? “... you’re my only friend… I really don’t want to lose you so quickly.” God why did he get so soft, all they ever did was talk… but Yomo actually treated him like an individual, he actually listened to him. 

No, he really didn't like this so he jumped up and pulled on the other’s sleeve, it always meant the same thing. 

“Aren't you tired of kissing me by now?” 

“No, not really. Now do it already.” 

He could just forget about everything every time they kissed, his body didn't react as strongly to it as it did in the beginning but it was still nice… it was different now, maybe even a little better. 

Someone knocked on the door but they didn’t really care. 

“Ahem, excuse me…?”

They immediately let go of another as soon as they realised that it was Renji’s sister who had knocked at the door moments before and now stood in the room, trying to pretend she hadn’t seen what they did. 

“S-Sorry.” Itou backed away from Yomo and fixed his hair. 

“It’s okay -” Just a few seconds later her husband and daughter entered the room. 

Touka started bouncing up and down as she spotted her uncle and the whoever it was who was there with her uncle but she liked him. “AH!” She screamed delighted as Itou offered her a hug. 

“She likes your boyfriend Renji.” Arata laughed as he watched Touka pinch and pull on the young man’s cheeks. 

For some reason he played along, no, when was honest he actually enjoyed being around this little human. Human children weren't as bad as human adults when he was honest, they weren't scared of him, they didn't judge him. Itou kissed her forehead and she started giggling. 

“Ah!” Little Touka pointed at her forehead and gave him a pleading look. 

“Do you want another kiss?” 

“Yes!” 

He laughed and kept on giving her small kisses until she wanted to be carried around by her uncle while Hikari was busy packing her brother’s suitcase, Arata walked over to Itou leaned against the windowsill, while quietly watching the others move around the room. 

“I'm surprised that she likes you so much. When she first met my parents and siblings she started crying and refused to be held by them.” The young father smiled and examined the other man. He didn't expect his brother in law to date such a young man, but well each to their own and Kuramoto was already an adult so… 

“I guess children love me.” And he wasn’t even lying. 

Why did this man stare at him…? Yomo didn’t mention that there were more investigators in this family, if he’d get overly defensive their cover would be blown and he really couldn’t get his friend in that much trouble. “U-Uhm is there something on my face…?” 

“Oh, no - ah… I was staring again, wasn’t I? I’m sorry I didn’t mean to be rude. It’s just… how old are you?” 

That was all he wanted to know? Seriously? “24.” 

Arata opened his mouth and had trouble closing it again. “W-What? You’re 24? You look so young, I thought you’re 20…” 

Renji joined them and pinched Kuramoto’s chubby cheeks. “It’s because he’s so soft, makes him look younger.” 

“At least one of us has to look young.” 

There was an odd spark in Yomo’s eyes that Itou coudln’t quite understand but it made his heart race and he turned away as he felt his cheeks turning red. Not because he was embarrassed but it was way better than having his blood rush into his lap again. 

Little Touka who was completely oblivious to whatever was going on in the adults’ minds right now started crying out of the blue. Not that she wanted attention but she was hungry and when she was hungry she got impatient and angry. 

“Hey little bunny stop kicking, I’ll get you something to eat -” Why did a kick from a small child hurt so bad? Renji couldn’t just put her down but it got a little distressing to hold her while she threw an anger tantrum. 

Itou sat down on the hospital bed and patted on his lap. “Give her to me.” 

“Are you sure…?” How was a ghoul supposed to take care of a human baby? When he was honest he was a little worried, but things did get a little difficult with since Touka refused to be held by either of her parents and Hikari had also look for Touka’s snacks in her bag. 

“Yeah I’m sure.” He reached out and placed the angry toddler on his right thigh. “Hey… calm down, no need to be angry.” Itou spoke so softly that the little girl looked at him, she stopped crying and kicking immediatly. 

“... but…” 

“No but.” To calm her down he gently patted her head until her mother gave him a little box, he carefully opened it with one hand and started feeding the little human with the soft cookies that her mother had prepared for her. She already had teeth and she didn’t hesitate to bite Itou who just laughed. “You’re not that hungry are you?” 

Once she had calmed down she curled up in his lap and started sleeping, Itou seemed to be a little helpless and stared at Renji who couldn’t help but smile.

“Well, I suppose you did this to yourself.” 

“I can’t just wake her up now but I can’t move what am I supposed to do -?” He stared down at the little human and sighed. Did she really trust him that much? Stupid little girl… he gently patted her tiny head. If she only knew the truth, he was much worse than the monsters she’d suspect to hide under her bed at night, he was real, while they weren’t. 

“I could ask one of the nurses if you can sleep here tonight.” Hikari smiled and covered her mouth with ther hand quickly. “I don’t know how long it’ll take for her to wake up again and I’m sure Renji is sick of sleeping alone.” 

Before either of them could think about stopping her she was already gone. Awkward silence spread and it was only broken by light snoring of the little girl that was still curled up in Itou’s lap. 

After another 20 more minutes she decided it’s time switch her nap place and started crying until her uncle lifted her up. She didn’t really sleep anymore. It was way too entertaining to look at Kuramoto who pulled funny faces at her. 

“Sorry that it took me so long, the nurse said yes and I got coffee for everyone… Ah, Itou-kun I wasn’t sure how you like your coffee so it’s black… I’m sorry -” Hikari smiled awkwardly and Renji stared at his sister in disbelief, did she really just call him by his first name? 

“It’s fine really! I’m allergic to milk, I don’t like soy milk… and I don’t like sweet things.” 

Both Hikari and Arata glanced at Renji and grinned. “Is that so…” 

“... I-” 

The other 3 broke out into laughter while Renji and Touka were left baffled and mildly upset. “Did you hear that? They’re mean to me Touka.” 

“Mean!” She squished her uncle’s cheeks. 

“No not me, they are -” 

Itou spend the rest of the evening sitting on Renji’s bed, watching the family interact with each other. Little Touka was passed from one Yomo sibling to the other, they were talking about when and how Renji would have to start working again, it seemed like Hikari wasn’t too happy about it. Touka coudln’t be bothered, she didn’t really listen to the adults, instead she always stared at Itou, but after a few more hours she got angry again, this time because she was tired. 

“I think we really should get going now. I took care of your flat, little sunshine. When you come back home tomorrow it’ll feel like you never left. Say goodbye Touka.” 

“Bah.” She smiled and waved but she didn’t want a kiss now, no, she was too angry for a kiss. They quietly left the room and Itou let his body fall into the mattress and he sighed heavily. 

“... I don’t get how some ghouls can spend so much time around humans…” Then he sat up and looked at the other. “No offence though, your family is nice…” 

“None taken, even for some humans it’s draining to be around other humans.” Renji walked over to his bed and frowned lightly. “If you’re taking up so much space where am I supposed to sleep?” He tried to get comfortable but Itou wouldn't let him. “... just sleep on me.” 

“Are you trying to seduce me?” 

It wasn't hard to do was it…? “Maybe I am.” But he didn't have to repeat himself as the ghoul sat down on top of him. 

“You're lucky…” 

“Hm?” 

“Never mind.”

Itou stared out of the window, the sun was already setting, usually he’d make sure that everyone in his ward was following the rules now, but he was sure they'd survive one night without him. He stretched and let his hands slip below Renji’s shirt as he got comfortable on his chest. “You're so warm…” 

No reply but he could feel that he was laughing, his chest was shaking and his breathing was irregular. What was so funny about it…? Itou let his hands slip to the side and pushed his upper body up so he could look Renji in the eyes. 

What was this…? He smiled so gently and let his fingers run through Itou's hair. 

He opened his mouth trying to say something, anything would be fine, but he couldn't. Why did his heart beat so fast? His stomach was rioting but not in a bad way. Since he couldn’t speak he leaned down and kissed him, this time it was less tame, Yomo used his tongue again, let his hands run all over Itou's body. At first the ghoul was capable of keeping himself and his voice under control but as soon as their bare skin touched he moaned softly in the kiss. 

“Already turned on by that?” 

Itou groaned and rubbed his lower body against Renji's. “I've been in the edge since you first kissed me… I told you that you don't really smell like food to me and while I am glad that you're willing to have sex with me, waiting for more than 3 months while you tease me every day…” Get to the point. “You're not exactly fair to me.” 

“Is that so?” He grabbed Itou's butt and dug his fingers deep into it. “Don't you think it's been hell for me too?” Their bodies rubbed against each other, Itou could feel Renji's erection through the fabric of his pants and it didn't really help. 

Before he could say anything Renji started kissing him again, this time more impatient and rougher as he was used to. If they wouldn't stop now there was no chance that this would end well but Itou didn't really care, he felt his heart rate increase and it got way too hot under their shared blanket. 

The fabric of their pants slowly got wetter, Renji stopped and pushed his hands own Itou's stomach and opened the zipper of his pants and pulled his cock out. 

“What are you doing…?” It wasn't like he didn't like it but he surprised as the other suddenly sat up and placed him on the foot end of the bed. 

“Praying that nobody will walk in on us.” Renji murmured before he got comfortable between Itou's legs. 

He felt his heart jump as the other firmly grabbed his cock right before teasing its tip with his tongue, then he let his tongue run down the full length of his shaft. The younger one exhaled sharply as Renji started to slowly swallow inch for inch. Itou dug his fingers deep into the other’s silver hair while his friend was busy trying to please both of them. 

It was so hard not to moan out loud and to push Renji deeper into this lap, but he had to resists all of these urges and every time someone walked passed their room his heart nearly stopped beating but Renji just couldn't be bothered. 

His tongue rubbed against the shaft of Itou's cock and the ghoul pressed his mouth shut so he wouldn't moan too loudly. 

The inside of his mouth was so warm and Renji was so eager, his left hand rested on Itou's thigh while he used to right hand to please himself. The ghoul could feel his vocal cords vibrate as he moaned softly, only making Itou shiver more and increasing this odd sensation. 

Did they make too much noise? The sucking and slurping was so incredibly loud and they both had a hard time not to moan too loudly, but with more time that passed, they cared less about someone walking in on them. 

“Re-Renji -” He whimpered, it was the first time that he ever called him by his first name, maybe it wasn't appropriate now but he couldn't stop himself. “I-” Too late, he ungently pressed the other’s head deep into his lap as he suppressed a scream. 

Renji lifted his head up after a while and coughed lightly before he slipped off the bed. 

“Where are you going?”

He only lifted up his hand up and walked into the bathroom, Itou focused on himself again, he crawled back in the centre of the bed and put his pants back on. Why wouldn't his heart stop beating so fast…? 

After a while they were snuggled up against each other again, Itou had fallen asleep quickly after Renji came back. His head was resting on his arm and he clung to his shirt as if he was making sure that Renji wouldn't leave again.

“Just friends huh…” Itou was the most unusual friend he ever had. “Sleep well.” He placed a gentle kiss on his forehead, resulting in Itou pulling him into a hug. 

“... you too…” The ghoul murmured before he rubbed his head against the others chest. Why did he even let this human so close…? But maybe it wasn’t bad, no… it surely wasn’t bad at all. 

“Please make sure to come back if your wounds start hurting again. There not a very high chance that it'll happen but make sure to take your medicine.” 

Who was in the room with them…? Itou slowly opened his eyes and saw Renji talking to a nurse, it was the same one that had taken care of him in the last 3 months. This pretty young girl, he didn’t quite like how she looked at Renji. It seemed like she completely ignored the fact that he had a boyfriend. 

Wait… Itou got up and didn’t look at them. What kind of thought was that even? Boyfriend? They were friends, nothing more. He needed to shake these thoughts off. 

“Here is your medicine and… my email address.” She smiled sheepishly before she left the room. So she really hit on Renji. 

As soon as they were alone again Itou looked at the human without saying a word, well he’d surely be better of with another human. She was pretty after all, just right for him. A little bold, a little mean, but nice enough. His family would like her better than him and he wouldn’t get in trouble if was going out with one of his kind. 

“... don’t give me that look…” Renji murmured as he wrapped his arms around Itou. 

“W-What…?” He was a little confused and huffed before he returned the gesture. “... I don't know what you're thinking but I'm sure it's…” Then he sighed and gave in. “I don't like the thought of having to share you with anyone.” 

“... did you just confess to me?” 

Itou pinched Renji's checks so he wasn't the only one who blushed. “No, why do you think that? I-I just don’t want your smell to mix up with someone else’s smell, you’re my human and I want you to smell like it.” 

“What if your scents mix at some point?” 

“... then everyone would know that you’re my human and I guess that would make me happy…” He admitted unwillingly. “Ah, let’s just go already. I can’t stand being in this damn hospital any longer.” 

Renji laughed and followed Itou outside, the more time they spend together the more natural it became to interact with each other. It wasn’t like he forgot about the other being a ghoul, it was just that Itou seemed to warm up around him, he wasn’t so tense all the time.

The 20th ward was so well organised and quiet, Itou felt a little uncomfortable taking the train here so he moved closer to Renji and grabbed his hand. People started staring and whispering, he could hear them but he ignored it. 

He glanced at Renji and wondered what was going on in his mind right now, why was he so unfazed by everything? Didn’t he mind that people thought of them as couple…? In the end it might even get him in a lot of trouble… 

“Let’s go.” 

So they were already there? Thank goodness, Itou didn’t like how the people stared at him, it only made him squeeze the human's hand a bit tighter. 

They quietly walked to a large building complex, how much did these investigators even earn…? Itou was a little baffled and started at Renji in disbelief. “... are you kidding me?” 

“I only live on the fourth floor, the apartment wasn’t to expensive.” 

“You bought it…” Now he had to ask. “How much money do you even earn?” 

Should he be honest? Should he really tell him that they earned more money when they killed more ghouls? “I’ve been living in a very small flat after the academy days, you know? I saved up the money I didn’t use because I don’t have any special interests… well and after a few years as active member of the CCG I could afford buying an apartment.” 

And how did he live? On a single mattress that was lying on the floor and a few camping utensils as furniture? Okay maybe he was being a little over dramatic now, but he really couldn’t imagine how someone like Renji decorated his flat. 

“Let’s just… go inside.” Or the pictures in his head would get even more absurd. He felt so out of place in this good neighbourhood, the people who lived in this building complex were mostly young families and wealthier citizens of the 20th ward. Then there was him with his dirty worn out shoes and the grey hoodie that definitely needed to see the inside of a washing machine again, his worn out black jacket and the most faithful pair of stonewash jeans the world had ever seen. 

Only now he noticed how well Renji dressed outside of his work uniform, they must look so odd together. Jesus, why did he even bother in first place? Why did he bother now? All they did was… whatever it was what they did, but he surely didn’t have any reason to worry about people’s opinion on them. 

“Are you coming?” Renji held the elevator door open for Itou who almost missed getting out on the right floor. 

Great, now he made it even worse, why did he feel so embarrassed? He side eyed the human who didn’t really seem to care. Thank goodness. 

“Just - … please don’t say anything okay. I know it, just… don’t mention it.”

Why was he suddenly in so much distress? Was Itou right about the camping utensils, but as he stepped into the apartment he couldn’t really tell what Renji was talking about. It was a wide and open space, the ceiling was high and white, the floor was dark, making the room look even larger. The furniture was modern, functional and minimalistic. “Well I don’t know what you’re talking about… nice collection of teddy bears by the way.” 

Itou couldn’t help but smile, so much to no special interest, huh. “Oh my God why are you blushing it’s not like you’re listening to boy groups or something -” And it seemed like he just hit a very sensitive spot as the investigator blushed even more. 

“Stop making fun of me -” 

“I’m not making fun of you, you idiot.” He could feel his heart beating violently as he walked over to Renji and pinched his cheeks. “You’re just -” What was he even…? “... forget it…” 

At least he could bite his tongue seconds before he said something stupid, but Renji looked a little led down but this sudden change of heart. “Uhm…” 

“I’d offer you something to eat but I know that wouldn’t end well, so… do you want coffee? My sister went grocery shopping for me this morning. I’m sure there’s some in the cupboard.” 

“Yes please.” Thank goodness they wouldn’t have to talk about this awkward situation. Itou slouched down on one of the chairs in the kitchen and looked around again, this apartment was huge, way to large for just one person. “Renji, why did you buy this apartment in first place…? I mean there are a lot of families here and you’re -” 

“Single, yes.” He smiled tired as he prepared 2 cups of coffee. “I don’t plan to marry and have own children if that’s what you want to ask… my last relationship ended when I was beginning my training as investigator. He said he can’t be in a relationship with someone who kills for a living… and… I understood him. It hurt, but that was ages ago. I suppose I changed.”

Itou felt his heart sink as he watched Renji smile. “... do you think it’ll work out between the two of you now, or what?” 

“Oh God no, no… people change you know, I barely know who he is now, he haven’t seen each other since we broke up and I think it’s better like that. I don’t hold any grudges, I just don’t think it would have worked out.” 

“Good to know.” Fuck, did he just say that out loud? But Renji didn’t seem to react, or he was just being polite. Trying to act cool he pulled out his phone and frowned as soon as he realised he really got a message... and it was even one he really didn't want to receive.

After a few more minutes the human placed the coffee cups on the table and stared down at his. “My sister always makes fun of me for using too much creamer and sugar, I really don’t like bitter things. Actually…” He sat down and stared out of the window. “... I’m the most useless investigator you’ll ever meet. I’m scared of living… and afraid to die, I think of the future but I don’t see myself in it… I have to kill… that’s my job... but...” Renji laughed and looked at Itou. “I can’t do this anymore.” 

Should he get up and hug him? How did you support a crying person? What should he … ? In the end he almost moved instinctively and sat down on Renji’s lap, he cupped his cheeks and wiped the tears away. After all that time it felt different to touch him now, it was more caring more … no he shouldn’t think like that. “... you know what would be great…” He sighed and looked into the other’s eyes. “If we could just leave this goddamn city behind… but… there’s a reason why we’re still here. I’m not saying that you should keep on killing ghouls, but be honest, it’s not really what you’re doing. You save lives.” 

While he was the one who took them… Itou felt uncomfortable being so close to someone who was way out of league. Only now he realised that his reckless behaviour had destroyed countless lives. 

Renji sniffed and pulled Itou closer, he just wanted to feel that he wasn’t alone now. “... but so did you… at first … I was mad at you…” He laughed and felt how the ghoul tensed up in confusion. “... but when I saw my family again, when I saw my sister crying because she was so happy… my little Touka… being so worried… even though she didn’t even understand what happened... just then I understood that you did me a huge favour.” 

Why couldn’t he just stop talking for once? Why couldn’t he just shut his mouth and be happy with things as they were. Itou felt like an idiot for being the one who was crying now as he held the human tightly in his arms. “... I’d do it again… you know…” 

Their lips touched again, in a different manner this time, this time it felt like they shared mutual affection for the first time as their fingers intertwined and all they wanted was to be close to each other. 

Itou didn’t move an inch away from his human and watched the coffee slowly cool down, the little steam clouds that rose above the dark liquid faded as they were still holding hands in blissful silence, but his mind was running wild. He didn’t want to be alone tonight, not for the sake of anything physical, he just didn’t want to leave Renji. “... there’s trouble in my ward…” 

“Hm…?” 

“Apparently a ghoul from a different prefecture has come to Tokyo and doesn’t quite understand the rules… I got a message from one of my… henchman... ” As much as he hated to leave chaos would ensue and it would surely attract the wrong kind of attention. “... mind if I come back after work is done…? I don’t want to sleep alone.” 

Renji cracked a smile and kissed Itou’s forehead. “You’re always welcome to come back to me, I’ll be waiting for you.”


End file.
